So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
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