remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
