yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
