11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
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