He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
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