she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
