That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
The air was thick with penises
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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