I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize
