dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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