You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
My breasts were aching with rage.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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