porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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