there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Randomize
