Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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