Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I could fuck to npr.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
