I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
it was like having sex with a tree stump
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
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