apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
