so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Randomize
