Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
operation have a gay friend backfired
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
