Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
