whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Randomize
