But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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