just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
