ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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