did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I have fence marks all over my body
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize