Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
