I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
