Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
