Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
