why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Randomize
