There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
