Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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