Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
