I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
