The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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