If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
