I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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