Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
