Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
