I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
