I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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