a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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