What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
