nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
