When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Randomize
