Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
