Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Randomize
