I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
