He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
