my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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