Nicole vs. Life
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
